keyword* - Torn

I'm torn in between guilt & ego.
I'm not proud of what I've done,
let alone to acknowledge it as an accomplishment
But then again how much more can I take after this?
I'm not quite sure what to do. Nothing helps.
Maybe because this is partially what I've always wanted
I want a new start, a good one definitely
As much as I hate to admit this,
I know this was never been the right way to end it
or to begin a different journey.

I'm sorry. I love you so much that I guess I fail to realize that I hurt you sometimes.